5 Ways to End an Argument Easily

As a wife of over thirteen years to a less than perfect man, I have come across a few techniques that seem to sooth my savage beast when tensions between us start to boil to the surface and get a little loud and pointless.

1. Recognize when you are getting loud and then return to a normal tone of voice. Once you stop yelling you will be surprised how much more of what you say is heard and remembered. Returning to a normal tone lowers the stress level and your heart rate so you can think more rationally about the disagreement you are having and whether it is even worth the argument. Men often mirror your reactions and will follow your lead.

2. Keep eye contact when he is talking,(even if he gets loud) and read between the lines. Don't stop listening if he gets a little loud. Your husband wants to be heard. He is not so different than the little boy he once was. Sometimes the only way they feel heard is by getting loud and flailing around a little. It's not always about his anger with you, it may be what he's not saying that's bothering him. Remember it's all in the eyes.

3. Use your loved ones (or even your animals) as a reason to quiet the argument down. Sadly sometimes disagreements erupt around our loved ones which is not comfortable or useful to anyone around. If things begin to get loud and you are not alone, use a calm voice to advise your man that it is not a good time to discuss the issue, and suggest you talk about it later when you are alone. Most men do not want to look like the bad guy in front of anyone and some forget to bring up the issue later all together.

4. Change your facial expression. I've found that if I let go of my scowl and evil stare during an argument and even try to adopt a more happy, silly or even sexy expression, than my husband can't keep his train of thought and we find ourselves either laughing or kissing. As I said before, men are very visual and often mirror your emotions. Basically, If you give happy, you get happy. (This works especially well for drunk men.)

5. Once your argument is over than let it be over. After the dispute is done and things have calmed down, the easiest way to start things up again is with slamming things around, mumbling snide comments or excessive heavy sighs when you both have agreed to let things drop. Though it is so easy for us women to continue with the argument in our heads and stay mad forever, we have to learn to let all the attitude go along with the argument. Truly forgiving can be truly peaceful.